Which reality TV show to watch based on your zodiac sign

Which reality TV show to watch based on your zodiac sign

Acclaimed comedian and woke warring Libra Dave Chappelle wasn’t joking when he professed that sometimes “Keeping It Real Goes Wrong.”

Indeed Dave, indeed, but the pursuit of onscreen authenticity never fails to deliver the rich turmoil, trash, turpitude and triumphs we cherish. Real or wrong, we can’t get enough.

For the better part of three decades, reality television has shown humanity at its best worst. From flipping tables on the “Real Housewives of New Jersey” to finding love on “The Bachelor” franchise , revealing naked fear, bald ambition, and utter shamelessness.

With more options than ever, it’s hard to choose which episodic junk food journey to indulge in. We’re here to help with a curated list of the reality show you should be binging based on your zodiac sign.

For more zodiac intel on your favorite reality stars be sure to check out our astrology cast breakdowns of “The Real Housewives” and “90 Day Fiancé” and “Love is Blind.”

ARIES (March 21 – April 19)

The Real Housewives

THE REAL HOUSEWIVES OF NEW JERSEY, (from left): Jacqueline Laurita, Lauren Manzo, Caroline Manzo, Melissa Gorga, Kathy Wakile, Teresa Giudice, 'A Bald Canary Sings', (Season 4, aired Sept. 16, 2012), 2009.
“The Real Housewives of New Jersey” is rife with Aries energy.
Bravo TV

The first installment of “The Real Housewives” aired on March 21, 2006, making the series itself an Aries. And folks, it tracks. Since its inception the franchise has brought us all manner of utensil weaponizing, drink throwing, name calling, marriage dissolving, white wine imbibing glory. For those looking to stick a tentative toe or horn into housewives waters, the “Real Housewives of New Jersey” is your best bet as the current cast is a veritable mess of Aries energy.

TAURUS (April 20 – May 20)

The Great British Bake Off

Still from
“The Great British Bake Off” appeases the sweet tooth and competitive streak of the average Taurus.
Mark Bourdillon/Love Productions

Pastries? Competition? Adorable accents? Taurus will find much to love and even more to salivate over in the “The Great British Bake Off” which follows passionate amateur baking fans as they compete in a crucible of confections to be crowned the UK’s Best Amateur Baker. Judging is based on aesthetics and flavor, two element at the top of the Taurus priority pyramid.

GEMINI (May 21 – June 20)

The Ultimatum

Still from Netflix's
“The Ultimatum,” like Gemini nature, is a study in extremes.

By and large, Geminis trade in extremes and extreme is the modus operandi of this dating show hosted by power couple Nick and Vanessa Lachey. The show pushes people to get hitched or call it quits all while tempting fate and boosting the likelihood of reality pay dirt by having them shack up with other potential partners. It sounds messy, it sounds morally compromising and it sounds quintessentially Gemini.

CANCER (June 21 – July 22)

The Kardashians

Travis Barker and Kourtney Kardashian.
“The Kardashians” never fail to deliver on family drama.

Cancer rules the fourth house of home and ancestry. Meanwhile, The Kardashians, the first family of reality TV, are a clan that trades in tangled roots, high drama, broken marriages, sibling rivalry, paternity scandals, familial bonds and catchphrase gold.

LEO (July 23 – August 22)

Summer House

A still from
Leos will love the mix of luxury and lowly behavior that “Summer House” provides.
Eugene Gologursky/Bravo

The elevator pitch for Summer House is “Booze-filled brunches, charity galas, bonfires and – of course – drama-filled romances are on the docket for young professionals in their summer playground.” Brunch? Bonfires? Bougie bull***t? Charity galas and dramatic love affairs? Pure catnip for lions.

VIRGO (August 23 – September 22)

Queer Eye

A promotional still from
Virgos will vibe with the self-improvement ethos of “Queer Eye.”

Every time a Virgo opens their eyes, they see potential and helping people realize their own is the lifeblood of this acclaimed series. “The premise of Queer Eye from the moment it was rebooted in 2018 has been to use the concrete lifestyle improvements that its experts offer to help people grow into better, healthier, more capable humans.” In kind, helping people grow into who they could be via practical improvements and dedicated hygiene is the distilled life purpose of this mutable earth sign.

LIBRA (September 23 – October 22)

The Bachelor/Bachelorette

Gabby and Rachel of the
Relationship forward Libras will enjoy watching someone else’s drama unfold on “The Bachelorette.”
ABC via Getty Images

Libra, represented by the scales and balances, is the sign of partnership and natives can appreciate the romantic roulette of fielding multiple matches while searching for the proverbial “one,” a la ABC’s The Bachelor and The Bachelorette. Lovers of love always and loyal partners sporadically, Libras will vibe with the pomp and circumstance of the rose ceremony and empathize with being in like with more than one person at a time.

SCORPIO (October 23 – November 21)

RuPaul’s Drag Race

A still from
RuPaul, host of “Drag Race” is a Scorpio.

Scorpio rules the eighth house of death, reinvention and other people’s money and fittingly, the Emmy Award-winning “Drag Race,” hosted by Scorpio superhero RuPaul, follows contestants as they avoid elimination and compete for a cash reward by proving their power to transform in fierce and fiercely original ways.

SAGITTARIUS (November 22 – December 21)

Below Deck

An image from
On board and usually on a bender, the cast of “Below Deck” will delight swashbuckling Sagittarius.

“Below Deck” will appeal to swashbuckling, adventure seeking, pleasure cruising archers. Sagittarians will get on board (pun intended) with the mixed bag cast that lives, sails and fails by a work hard, party harder ethos amid the ever changing backdrop of far flung locations.

CAPRICORN (December 22 – January 19)

Too Hot To Handle

Promotional still from
Equal parts hedonist and capitalist, sea goats will sing for “Too Hot To Handle.”
Tom Dymond/Netflix

All Capricorns are born with something to prove and love the chance to leverage self-control for capital gains. Enter the Netflix series “Too Hot To Handle,” a reality show that pits the urge for carnal satisfaction against the promise of cold, hard, cash.

AQUARIUS (January 20 – February 18)

Big Brother

A publicity still from
“Big Brother” is binge worthy for water bearers.

Aquarius rules the eleventh house of community and natives are prone to paranoia about surveillance making “Big Brother,” which “follows a group of people living together in a house outfitted with 94 HD cameras and 113 microphones, recording their every move 24 hours a day,” a dystopian hell scape nightmare come true and a bait they can’t refuse.

PISCES (February 19 – March 20)

Love is Blind

Photo of a couple from
“Love Is Blind” will hit home for Pisces.

Anything that involves a pod will pique the interest of a Pisces; are we sleeping? Isolating? Taking a sound bath, taking drugs? Will there be dolphins? The most terminally romantic sign in the zodiac, fish folks will find fellowship in the premise of the Netflix series “Love Is Blind,” “a social experiment where single men and women look for love and get engaged, all before meeting in person.”

Astrology 101: Your guide to the stars

Astrologer Reda Wigle researches and irreverently reports back on planetary configurations and their effect on each zodiac sign. Her horoscopes integrate history, poetry, pop culture and personal experience. She is also an accomplished writer who has profiled a variety of artists and performers, as well as extensively chronicled her experiences while traveling. Among the many intriguing topics she has tackled are cemetery etiquette, her love for dive bars, Cuban Airbnbs, a “girls guide” to strip clubs and the “weirdest” foods available abroad.